Small steps

Some, not all of us, have officially retreated under rocks. I asked, "This this that happened, what do you think?" "Uhu?! Really? I haven't read the news for a week." I wish I could also cover my eyes and ears 24/7. All of us wish we could. 

The thing is, we tried, tried all we could, before the election. Now, this is what most Americans want; all that is left for us to do is throw our arms in the air and shrug our shoulders. "I hope y'all are enjoying what you bought. Too late to return it, that's for sure."

Our lives will be hugely impacted. But we, as most of us Asians, over the years, built a solid foundation for our families. On top of that, we are used to being ignored, suppressed, discriminated, and even violated, with no expectations but only unlimited creativity for alternatives that are crucial for survival. Grocery price? Really is the least of my concerns. 

We will get through, easily. And at this moment, except for the LGBTQ community, I don't really know who else we could fight for. In this country, us fighting for others' rights is already an absurd concept, us minorities in race, gender, and culture who don't struggle any less in life. Never heard of anybody who holds a majority in race, gender, or culture reaching out to us and conveying their will to fight for us. Meh, this world. Maybe precisely because most people are this indifferent and cold, the world is turning out to be like this.  

But ya, in all seriousness, I will do whatever I can to help. I'm going to continuously safeguard freedom of expression and minority rights in China by attending events and going to the streets. I will stand by my prof's side and do whatever I can to protect what we have built. I have built these babies up from the beginning, and they will forever be part of me and my life. I will never back down, I will never give up, and I will never lower my voice, no matter how dark it will get. As long as I'm here, nothing is going to happen!

In the introduction section of rock school's new season, my event partner was surprised that my hobby was writing sci-fi. He exclaimed, "Wow, I've never heard of that, and I meet many people all the time!" Maybe the conversation never went there? Not sure under what circumstances people usually start talking about their sci-fi-loving hobbies? I seldom am asked about my other hobbies besides learning and playing music in rock school. If people could get through one layer of my hobby after allowing me to talk about my work, that's a lot of intimacy already! 

But in my mind, everybody loves sci-fi and always watches or reads sci-fi movies and books! I found myself indulging in sci-fi magazines since I was 8. My head has always been filled with imaginary, fantastical landscapes. My dreams too, sometimes with colors. That never changed since I was 8... What do people think about all day, all night, if not sci-fi??

Will go with Leena and Sangha to Costa Rica in April. We three are totally sticking to the new "tradition" of traveling to South American countries once per year. Leena loves to research and plan; Sangha has a lot of input since she lived in Colombia for some time. I am in the supporting role of all the planning and booking, always telling them, "Yes, choose whatever you girls like, and I will surely like it!" "Yes, I can be the driver, a great one indeed!" I seriously can't wait to be united with them two and go on our adventures again! I'm truly grateful that people in my life all love to plan trips, arrange finances, and make money, except Noah, so I, with Noah, can comfortably enjoy what we love, which has nothing to do with the above...  

I don't aim for big breakthroughs anymore but only focus on the small steps. Brought my parents to prof's house should be one of those significant small steps. 

One day prior, I played the interview of prof on tv for my mom to watch, he was telling many heartfelt stories about how he ended up doing what he does. Despite many guests in his house, prof sat with my parents and chatted with them for a long time. My mom was happy. It was not guaranteed that my parents would even come to join us, but they did, knowing whatever they knew. My mom also cooked some delicious dishes to bring along. 

Prof is always calm and gentle, respectful to everyone, and the kindest human being I've met. Now, I look around in my own time and in history too, I realize that all the people, mostly men, I look up to have one common trait: the kindest human being people around them ever knew. Be it a writer, a philosopher, a poet, or a painter. "Mostly men" is because the adequately documented human history is dominated by men, hence there are too few female figures for me to sieve through and pick my favorite.

Prof has a young heart; he has stayed vibrant and open since I met him 15 years ago. His inner child has never left him. That gentle, kind, also rebellious, and independent young adult with long black hair, he never allowed him to grow weary and gray.        

With my parents getting to know prof's life story, going to his house for a Lunar New Year dinner, and low-key accepting all of us and our choices for life, my parents are the true heroes. I also had a very calm but serious discussion with my parents about what I chose to do years ago with my prof and continued doing. I assured them that I knew the risk and had been taking precautions since day one. I believe now they agreed and accepted it with all of their hearts. 

Friends came over today to celebrate the Lunar New Year. My mom made a massive amount of delicious food again, and everybody ate to their throats. Sandra brought along her sweet new boyfriend. Nice Gutamala guy from Florida! Before they left, my mom held on to Sandra and gave her some life advice. I ask my mom, "Mom, do you think Aris is handsome?" She replied, "No matter how he looks, women should never hang themselves in one tree. You can keep him or kick him away, it all depends on whether he is sweet to you. Never hang in one tree!" 

"Very wise, mom!" Very wise indeed!