My view on feminism

I'm responding to my friends' comments on the book I am reading about bringing up girls, one section that the author talks about the difference on brain function between boys and girls. First of all it's great to see the discussion on feminism in India, thank you for updating me the information. I have my own stand on this issue and now I feel the the need to go through it in English too. Yes I indeed quite often express and discuss this topic in my Chinese social media.

1. While I am agreeing on the existence of different brain function on boys and girls(as the book illustrates), I think rather easily people take it to a different degree, especially people coming from a patriarchal background. For example, words such as "wild" and "naughty" are not to discribe brain functions but character and personality. Although boy brains and girl brains are wired differently (in most cases), personality exists without a pattern. Take my kids for example, my boy is truly a boy-like "engineer brain", and my girl excels in sensing emotions and expressing, they play different kinds of toys without any influence from outside. Meanwhile my daughter is more naughty and more wild than my boy.

2. From the reading I kind of understood (some schools of) feminism in nowadays India is trying to eliminate the difference between men and women, physical and mentally. In my opinion, admit the difference is not unfeminist, but only scoring the difference unequally is unfeminist.

For example, when I say "my girl is such a girl, she is loving and caring, she plays doll all day long." As most of us who grew up in a patriarchal society, our brian automatically gives a conclusion: "She is a mother material." But that's absolutely not in my mind. I only see the difference of brain function in my two kids but I do NOT think one will neccesarily "achieve higher" than another ("achieve higher" as what the society thinks - higher salary and higher position, personally I don't think there is another job more important than mother).

Why? Because if a brain is wired to feel deeper and wider emotions, to better master the language and is more expressive. What does this indicates? This brain will be suitable to be a future diplomat, politician, thinker, philosopher, leader, manager, negotiator, communicator, famous writer or well-known comedian. But why in such women-brain-suitable fields, rarely you see successful women? Because they are told "NOT TO DO" from a young age. And all of this is not the result of the difference in men and women brains, but a result of Patrilineality that could be traced back to the beginning of human society. We are still living in that after-world.

3. Aren't men and women tremendously different? Obviously, because our hormones are totally different and it affects almost everything. Men can separate body and emotions, women just can't. Men can have their brain blank as a paper for the longest time, women's brain never stops, not even in their sleep. Women have to accept the reality that a "hormone bomb" is coming each every month to mess up their emotions and feelings, men have no idea whatsoever.

4. As a feminist, I believe it is meaningless to ask women to match up to men, instead women should live up to their own potentials. Because we both are equally powerful creatures with our differences. Actually most fields are suitable for both women brain and men brain, the only difference is determination,  ambition, hardwork and belief.

I hope I have expressed myself clearly with where I stand as a feminist and I welcome your further discussions.

#feminist #feminism