The consultant

Raj is on business trip in NY for 2 nights, that's the only nights I can put on my kind of shows in tv and work or write meanwhile. Sometimes I work as intensely as morning hours, have absolutely no idea what is playing on tv, if the show is boring.

When Sabrina and I were shopping in Ranch 99 for hotpot, I gave her updates and she also told me, "Ya, we started trying role play... it has become fun now..." "What?! Yaaa!" Basically she made Dib watch "Sex Room" with her and they are also inspired by the show. I insisted that they should watch that show together, that night when Sabrina was staying with me here, I made her watch with me for 3 episodes. I'm so happy that they are finally getting on the track. "You need dildo you know, not only vibrators. Coming with only vibrator is not much different from coming with your hands, we've been doing that since we were 12, no? You need something inside, you need the speed too. If Dib can't do that now, try dildo yourself first, then later he can help as you instruct. That kind of coming is in an entirely new level, you won't be able to hold down your scream, seriously, you won't be able to. Well, maybe if you do it yourself you still can, but if you do it with him, either it's him in you or a dildo he is operating, it's going to be a new level because of the excitement. Well if you have to compare dildo and a real penis, a real one is incomparably better, much much better. All he needs is practice, you will get there, you will get there hihi."

Lol, I have turned into their secret sex consultant, well, more of her sexual pleasure consultant. I brainstormed with her, suggesting them to take classes, there are so many available in SF. Raj and I were planning to learn some new tricks but we got too busy ourselves, plus we have very good sex already. But they could definitely use the classes, make him understand how to do it, teach them some tricks that are custom-made for their situation. However it doesn't look like they are quite there yet, a good start though, watching sex show together and learning from it. That's why Sabrina now needs some actually useful tricks from me, such as sex candle, dildo, double dildo etc, things you won't hear even in sex shows. 

A few days ago, I thought I saw T in my Insta. Usually I never scroll down to see the view list, then suddenly I did that day and I saw an account with "joke" in its name, no profile pic, no post no follower no following, nothing. Interesting. Then I paid a little more attention and realized this account was following my stories. Jokes and basketball, that's just so T. I thought he finally came to find me outside of GFW, just one VPN and one search, anyone can find me in my social. Or, he and family finally moved to a safe place abroad? I still feel so guilty that I didn't tell him about my other WeChat account before my old one was blocked access. I tried though, I tried to add some mutual friends, the only mutual friends I knew, but they were not in contact for a long time. 

If there's any person in this world who still would stalk me to see if I'm good and happy, that would be him, no? Who else would put "joke" in their name, lol! It was English though, a little weird. But with T, it's nothing like anything, just the genuine concern for a very old friend. I don't really have many old friends left, not many of them I consider or would be considered "important" or "connected to". With T, I can be 100% sure that I'm still important, kind of, in a way. With such a ghost account, it has to be someone who created it just to check on you, no? Someone whose social circles don't use Insta at all, who else if it's not a Chinese then? Completely blocked off from all social platforms outside of GFW. But using VPN is categorized as a crime now, it has become more and more dangerous day by day, not only using the internet or speaking about anything, but living there, for any activity. So I just wanted to talk to the account to find out. Then that account disappeared, never replied to me. That was strange too, because T would talk to me, I would then give him my Wechat account which is inside GFW. Anyways, must be a glitch in Insta, stupid Meta, stupid social media.

I have become a doggie aunty finally. Sabrina said, "I need a dog in my life!" I was like, "Alright! If you are getting a puppy, I am going to be the cool aunt who comes to pamper, take photos and leave after sunset." Lexi is a white/creamy haired golden retriever, 8 weeks old when she came. What a cute puppy, exactly like a baby. Sabrina actually became happier when the puppy now in her life. I am happy for her. But I guess for puppies, I rather stay this way, certain kind of commitment but not for real. It will take up too much of my time and energy, I won't be able to enjoy our adventures to the full then. Our parties and travels, I think I still love those more. Naa, no third kid. Aunty is a good role.