I am Back!

Sunny all the way from the parking building to my office! I am Back!!!!

My stack of chocolate was waiting for me. I am finally back in the office after almost a month of sickness! Well, prof went to TW for several weeks also, so I skipped a lot of in-office days even while in mild pain.

Started feeling fabulous on Wednesday morning after going to the TK classes. Even last Wednesday, while teaching musical storytime for the three classes one by one, I was in a certain degree of pain. Then this week, on Monday, I went to the street for a Tibetan course; on Tuesday, I slept until 11 a.m. to recover but still woke up with sore arms and legs. During yesterday's musical stortytime with the kiddos, I was in Full Energy!! Haven't felt that for weeks!

I used my voice without conservation, smiled ear to ear, and took extra steps to entertain the kids. Of course, each time, kids would come forward to hug me and tell me how much they missed me and loved me, even when I was in pain. But I finally can give the entirety of self to them! 

I realized that when I am in full-energy mode, which is 99% of the time, I am such a lively and loveable human being! I hop and skip rather than walk; I always smile and pay attention to people's words with respect, acceptance, or curiosity. I have such pureness and integrity inside my mind that I never overthink or think ill of anything or anyone. I speak my mind! I act straightforwardly, with the highest level of authenticity. If one day a pill is available, once you take it, it will reveal your mind to the outside world; I would take it without any hesitation because of how pure my mind is. I trust and have faith in people as well as the process. I habitually put myself into others' shoes and sympathize with them. I give whatever I have to people, trying to help in any way and wishing for the best of whoever I encounter. And I am full of gratitude! It does take several weeks of low-energy illness before bouncing back to realize that!

My Funk rehearsal went exceptionally great on Wednesday night too! My keyboard parts were coming together and sounding solid. For the most part, I improvise with my ears and fingers. It's my first time doing something wild like this; it's beyond words. Bandmates and directors went the extra mile to tell me how good my keys sounded in each song! That made me smile ear to ear again! 

I remember feeling so happy after the musical storytime when I was home eating my mom's hundred homemade dishes. I felt like I was practically on top of the world, having everything that needed to make me happy at my hand. I remember feeling this was the definition of a fulfilled life; there wouldn't be anything more and better. This is it, and I am living through it, enjoying it, and cherishing it second by second. 

The other day, during discussions with the "resistance force" group of Chinese friends, I heard this phrase: "Being kind without acting equals unkindness." The same goes for "good people keep silent is as bad as being evil." To hell that I'm gonna be the silent one! I have never ever kept my mouth shut. I have lost so much, and gained so much too, because of who I am. I am a person who will sacrifice herself to stand up for injustice and who will not blink when facing the powerful at gunpoint. I am the protector, and yes, I am back!